It’s taboo to talk about death, right? Well, yes, in most circumstances it’s not the best topic in the world, and we certainly wouldn’t suggest you bring it up as you preferred conversation on a first date, but at the end of the day (excuse the pun) death happens to everyone, and we should talk about it.
It Comes to Us All
Not only does death happen to us all, but eventually we’ll need to attend a funeral at some point in our lives.
So if you’re wondering how to act at a funeral if you’ve never been, or you need a quick start guide on what to tell your kids about attending a funeral, this article will give you five tips on how to have good funeral etiquette.
Say the Right Thing
Knowing what to say to a grieving family is very awkward. Phrases like “she’s gone to a better place” sound both insensitive and condescending, not to mention insulting if they are not particularly religious.
It’s safest to say with very neutral phrases like “my thoughts are with you” or “I’m sorry for your loss”. These phrases convey sympathy without going over the top.
Give A Thoughtful Gift or Card
Many people will wish to send a card or a gift to the family, and this can be very well received. It’s best to talk to the funeral director first thought. A professional funeral director like exithere.com will be able to guide you on the right flowers to send, or if there is a particular charity or crowdfunding effort.
Wear the Right Thing
Opt for black, or very dark colors. Go for something conservative something modest, and something smart. Leave the lace and frills at home and don’t wear any kind of veil over the face. Some venues, particularly religious ones, may request certain clothing such as a head covering or no bare shoulders, find this out before you go.
Mark Your Exits
If you have very young children, it’s best to quietly ask an officiant where the nearest exit is or ask to be sat near an exit. Whilst there will usually be crying at a funeral, having a child scream the place down because they are hungry can add to the pressure.
Ask an officiant where you can take your child to calm them down that will be out of earshot of the main service, and make sure that they are adequately fed, watered, and entertained before you go in to minimize the risk of a meltdown.
Shelve the Selfies
The funny thing about funerals is that they are one of the few times that family members might see each other, other than weddings. It may be tempting to grab your phone and pucker up a pout for a selfie, but it’s not very appropriate.
If you must share photos or you wish to take a photo of someone or something, try to do it very discreetly, and not during the service.